Tag: nstgrm

[img] January 13, 2020 at 04:21PM

“Dude,” said Luna. “Rager last night! Look at all that shotgunned Claw.”
“I don’t know, Kid,” I said. “Toddler seating and empty Claw cans just seems weird.”
“Aw, fattyoldfatfat forgot how to par-tay?!”
“Like you’d know-“
“Ain’t no laws with Claws, Beeatch!”
“Ok, let’s move.”
January 13, 2020 at 04:21PM
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[img] December 22, 2019 at 05:54PM

One big perk of sharing life w/ the greatest living Costume Designer @catmthomas: In IRL, I get to don the literal coats of some of iconic film & tv characters. Congrats the the #mrrobot creative team on the finale 2nite of one of best TV shows ever. // cc: @samesmail @regattadeblanc #todcampbell
December 22, 2019 at 05:54PM
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[img] December 22, 2019 at 09:06AM

“Is New Years a sunset or a sunrise?” Luna wondered.
“Depends,” I said, “on the year you had.”
“Hello, McFly? Absolute time is soo last year. I’m talking curves and spirals, you know, like, space-time? Duh. Relativity says-“
“Ok, Princess Particle.”
“Pfft, Basic Biff.”
December 22, 2019 at 09:06AM
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[img] December 10, 2019 at 08:06PM

“C’mon, Kid, why mope on the rain?” I entreated Luna. “You’re Scottish. Claggy fields are your people.”
“Tongue ma fart-box, ya walloper,” she snarled.
“Aw, look. There’s patches of heather, under dreich skies. This is your wheelhouse, yes?”
“Shut ya geggie, ya numpty.”
December 10, 2019 at 08:06PM
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[img] December 03, 2019 at 01:33PM

“Je déteste l’hiver”, a déclaré Luna.
“Mais regarde la beauté,” j’ai contré.
“L’air pur… la neige blanche…”
“Mon nez est gelé. Et toute la neige à New York devient jaune et noire.”
“La neige jaune est de ta faute, Tin-Tin.”
“Tu m’as appris à faire pipi dehors, Asshat!”
December 03, 2019 at 01:33PM
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[img] November 26, 2019 at 10:36AM

“That sign’s so Shamu!” Luna laughed.
“The Sea World whale?” I asked.
“No, silly, the existential guy.”
“Camus?”
“Don’t get uppity. Not everyone speaks French!”
“Ok, so like No Exit?”
“Yeah, except in this one, 3 whales are trapped in a backyard pool-”
“Man, you are-”
“No, dog I am.”
November 26, 2019 at 10:36AM
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[img] November 24, 2019 at 05:18PM

“So that woman we passed just said the clouds are… ‘breaking up?’ Luna queried.
“Yeah, they’re done with the rain.”
“Good. Dump that wet blanket,” she nodded emphatic. “They should date the sun.”
“Sun’s committed to the moon.”
“They hardly see each other. It’ll never last.”
November 24, 2019 at 05:18PM
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[img] November 21, 2019 at 04:05PM

“She who sitteth on the Stone of Destiny shall be Queen of all she surveys!” Luna proclaimed.
“You know the Stone of Scone’s in Scotland, yes?”
“Saoghail!” she snarled. “Traitor!”
“Stop-”
“Courtiers, take this man. Then off with his head!”
“Ok, Khaleesi. Mark it and move on.”
November 21, 2019 at 04:05PM
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[img] November 13, 2019 at 05:06PM

“Forget Mexico!” Luna declared. “Build a wall to the sky at Canada!”
“What the-?” I said.
“It’s frickin’ freezing! The wall can let people in, just keep the wind out!”
“C’mon-”
“Alexa said a ‘Canadian front’ caused this. Send the wind back!”
“Let’s go. You’re frostbitten.”
November 13, 2019 at 05:06PM
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[img] November 10, 2019 at 11:53AM

Luna pointed up at a bare ginkgo tree. “Bet you didn’t know in spring, ginkgoes scarf all their leaves and stems-”
“Scar.”
“Whatev, dude. They scarf all their leaves in, like, 1 day. Then in the 1st hard frost, they upchuck them all at once.”
“Bonnie Botany, ladies & gentlemen.”
November 10, 2019 at 11:53AM
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[img] October 28, 2019 at 04:57PM

“No way,” Luna pouted. “Bugs are for frogs.”
“Maybe evolve?” I said. “Too much meat is mean.”
“You know what’s mean? Why an onion makes you cry!”
“Do tell.”
“The sulfur in the air warns of murder. It’s screaming!”
“Stop-”
“You stop, you… allium assassin!”
“Ok-”
“Kale killer!”
October 28, 2019 at 04:57PM
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[img] 20190928.1042

“It’s weirdo,” Luna fronted.
“Yeah?” I asked.
“You’re Westy.”
“Yeah?”
“And I’m a Westie.”
“Yeah?”
“That’s like if you’re Fern and your one plant is a fern.”
“First, I was Westy way before you got here. Also, they’re not even spelled the same.”
“Excuses, excuses. Still weirdo.”
September 28, 2019 at 10:42AM
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