../melody in chaos
the trick is to get paid for just being you
to “turn a trick” is to be paid to be someone else’s “you”
adopting war terminology for sports (“bomb,” “shotgun,” “blitz,” “strikers,” “defense,” “offence,” “flanks,” “attack,” “sacking,” etc) turned war into sports
Now, those not fighting are said to be “on the sidelines.”…
continued...
“The weirdest,” Luna piped up at the midpoint of our daily walk, “is how everyone now is so savvy yet so powerless.”
I absorbed the thought. “Ignorance is bliss, Kid, indeed.”
Prospect Park, NYC / 20220304.1437
“I thought they outlawed plastic straws here,” Luna averred.
“Those aren’t straws,” I said. “They’re PVC gas mains.”
“That’s a straw!” she shot back in her best Daniel Plainview voice, with loud slurps. “I. Drink. Your! Milkshake! I DRINK IT UP!”
“When did you-”
“I will eat you!”
September 24, 2019 at 06:14PM
instagram
“Look! The Brapps are training little Tanner to potty outside like me!” Luna exhorted with optimism.
“You sure it’s not just a stoop giveaway?” I asked.
She sniffed between the lid and seat. “Well if so, it would give new meaning to the phrase ‘free shit!'”
“This city,” I sighed.
August 05, 2019 at 06:51PM
instagram
“Do you think they tossed it because the kid’s a musical disappointment?” Luna queried.
“C’mon,” I shook my head. “Not everyone’s Conservatory bound.”
She turned and taunted at a parlor window. “What’s the matter, can only play in C? Can’t handle 3/4 time?!”
“OK, let’s go.”
July 19, 2019 at 04:09PM
instagram
“Hey, asshat,” Luna piqued, “why am I wet?”
“My app said no rain for a couple hours, but this cell-”
“So get a new app, asshat.”
“Where did you learn that word?”
“From you,” she gazed off, “the asshat.”
Voice Over: “Remember, people who say asshat have dogs who say asshat.”
“My name! Free condo for me!” Luna exclaimed.
“Not how it works.”
“Fiddlesquats! Demand they license my name, then. I refuse to be their Playboy Bunny!”
“An infringement claim. That’s rich, Luna.”
“Shut up, you’re the not-rich fringement!”
“OK, ok. Just drop your deuce.”
April 26, 2019 at 01:43PM
via instagram
“They German?” Luna piped up. “The Spa Wife? Weird bodega name.”
“No, Asian-American.”
“Divorced?”
“Nope. Married and happy. Name’s a joke between them.”
“Weirder.”
“No weirder than your dream of an artisanal scrunchie mall kiosk called Bad Dog Buns.”
“Pfft!”
March 26, 2019 at 03:01PM
via instagram
stationary chevy update: still stationary https://t.co/RasRjiVG9c pic.twitter.com/Gi1SZerX4p
— ../westy (@westyreflector) February 23, 2019
February 23, 2019 at 05:56PM
via IFTTT
“Wanna know the secret to living your self authentical?” Luna asked.
“Sure,” I replied.
“Style through the salt.”
February 13, 2019 at 05:19PM
via instagram
“So what’s your Super Bowl pick?” I asked Luna.
“Ooh, the macro one at M Café in LA on Melrose? Well, king salmon and-“
“No, football,” I shook my head.
“Well, I like Man City over Arsenal-“
“American football.”
“Oh. The Saints. Duh.”
February 03, 2019 at 06:21PM
via instagram
“Hey!” Luna piped. “This’s the one where DeNiro beat up litterbugs, yes?”
“No, that’s Clean Streets,” I said. “In Green Streets, DeNiro’s Johnny loses bets over climate change, and gets buried under a pedestrian triangle.”
“Oh, right! ‘Where’s ya footprint now, Sal?!’ So good!”
January 08, 2019 at 04:31PM
via instagram
“Free to take,” I entreated Luna, as we stared at the Slope-iest Park Slope stoop giveaway ever.
“Which,” she asked, “the book or the husband?" pic.twitter.com/RBLziNfSHm— ../westy (@westyreflector) December 11, 2018
December 11, 2018 at 06:23PM
via IFTTT
i never jump
but sometimes
wonder as to be
/ squeezed between wheel and rail /
/ liquified into sidewalk cracks /
/ betrayed by the softness of water at terminal velocity /
a final taste of blood into quiet black
forever suspension
soul mixed into the city gutter
always only almost /
the city self-harm paradox:
selfish + public
too many other’s
commutes, too, interrupt
missed the train announcement again
headphones too loud
head too cloud
unprepared for changes
anyway
someday
now
Disposable flossers underfoot everywhere in every neighborhood say, “Litter free? Please. Tartar-free is where it’s at!” #TartarFreeNYC
December 03, 2018 at 02:04PM
via instagram
Luna belting out “Gimme a Gizzard Blizzard” from her upcoming HGTV Thanksgiving special, “Thanks To Me.”
November 21, 2018 at 01:00PM
via instagram